Nature fails yet again

Setting: toasty warm kitchen of the Dollhouse on a cold wintry night

Cast: a lonely and melancholy P

S has gone for a few days and I although she left only a few hours ago I am starting to feel quite alone and my thoughts are turning quite bitter and depressing. Have you ever been let down by someone or a situation that promises to be so exciting and then falls short of its asseverations? I have this week. I have been heartbroken and destitute and sorely disappointed but let me start at the start of my tale of woe.

I was given an ant circus (similar to an ant farm) for my birthday a few weeks ago. I had mixed feelings about this. As a child your main foes in nature are seagulls, ants, snails and bees. Every child knows that seagulls must be chased, bees must be avoided at all costs and ants and snails must squashed. I don't know how children acquire this knowledge I think they might be born with it. With the acquisition of the ant farm I was faced with a dilemma: do I tend for and nurture for a species I have been at odds with for so many years or do I throw away a thoughtfully purchased birthday present. I decided as I am no longer a child it is time to throw childish ideas away and so I would create the greatest ant circus in the southern hemisphere. I was also excited about the prospect of waking up every morning and coming out to see new tunnels and caverns made in the layers of soil I carefully collected.

Ok so I didn't carefully collect it I just chucked some dirt in. I didn't have any of the food the book recommended like carrots, raw meat or vitamins so I put in some stale chocolate biscuits and orange marmalade. Each day I checked on the ants but there was nothing happening, in fact everytime I looked there were less ants. Now a week later there are none! I think they are all dead! Why does this happen to me? First the spiders and now the ants. I will never trust anything or anyone ever again. Maybe it was my fault because I didn't provide the correct cuisine but nobody's perfect. I thought ants were supposed to be hardy creatures, well obviously they are not. I got no joy out of this enterprise whatsoever. I am very upset and angry and I'm sorry for my grammar and punctuation mistakes in this post but at this point I'm starting to wonder if anything even matters anymore